


He Started It!

by Anawrath, apocalypseWallflower



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Earthstuck, M/M, NSFW, Nonhumanstuck, Tentibulges, Troll Anatomy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-27 10:01:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10003493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anawrath/pseuds/Anawrath, https://archiveofourown.org/users/apocalypseWallflower/pseuds/apocalypseWallflower
Summary: You can NOT believe the audacity of this asshole. Interrupting you during a RANT of all things. But, oh, he is SO going to get it!





	

**Author's Note:**

> #ThankAnaforfoodfightidea
> 
> COMMENCE HEADCANONS
> 
> ((I SWEAR Kankri and Karkat are of age, even though Karkat is still in high school. #Don'tsueme))

**~Karkat~**

"#F9ullanguage, Karkat." My Dancestor, Kankri, stated in the MIDDLE OF MY RANT. 

"FUCK OFF." I shouted in response. "I WAS VENTING, YOU ASSHOLE." _I can NOT believe Kankri has the audacity to fucking interrupt me in the middle of a RANT._

"Y9u sh9uld always tag y9ur triggers, Karkat." Kankri said with little to no emotion on his face and in his voice. _Probably tired of having to repeat the same thing over and over again to me._ "6ecause, y9u never really kn9w..." _Oh, great. No HE's on a rant._ Sighing in frustration, I rubbed my face in my hands. A door opening and closing could be heard, faintly, from downstairs. Sighing in relief, I snuck away from Kankri to go down and see who is obviously my ancestor, Signless. _Good, at least now I can vent full-heartily without the chance of being interrupted._ Feeling the need for attention, I ran over and hugged him tightly. _Man, I missed his smell. Actually, I missed him in general._ Inhaling his scent, I felt a little more at peace. He hugged me back straight away and I was glad for that. Once our hugging session had ended, I vented to him. About really everything that was bothering me; Strider being a douche-nugget, Kankri being an asshole, high school being boring, other more-minor things. Signless listened contently as he made us all dinner. I always wanted just to be with him whenever he was here, as it was rare, but I _really_ needed to vent first. 

* * *

 

Helping Signless set the table, we held quite a bit of playful banter now that I had gotten all of my ranting out of the way. Minutes later, all three of us were sitting at the dinner table. Even though we held our normal, everyday conversations, there was an obvious awkwardness between Kankri and I. "9h, Signless. That reminds me, I have s9mething t9 tell y9u fr9m when y9u were g9ne." Kankri spoke up, suddenly. _What's he going on about?_

"Yeah, and what's that, Kankri? I sure hope you two haven't been fighting terrible since I've been gone." Signless replied. _I mean, we disagree on things, but I wouldn't say we fight fight._  

"N9t at all. It's just that Karkat has 6een swearing in excessive am9unts ever since y9u t99k up this new j9b. I feel it's 6ec9ming quite a pr96lem." _The Little Asshole. That's it!_ Taking a spoonful of my lasagna, I flung it at Kankri's head. Kankri doesn't really do anything but sit there, dumbfounded, while Signless just laughs. "I'm s9rry f9r this, 6ut..." Suddenly, there was lasagna flying towards Signless' head. It's origin: Kankri. "#s9rryn9ts9rry." My eyes widened in shock at that but I still got out a good chuckle and so did Signless and Kankri. _I didn't know he could be so laid-back over something like this._ Kankri, obviously. Signless is pretty chill about most things. Within minutes, there was an all-out food fight and no one was really winning. More like, we were all losing because the food wasn't being eaten and we would /definitely/have to take showers after this. However! It was all in good fun, so maybe we all won in that aspect. 

* * *

 

Collapsing into my chair after like twenty minutes of madness, I started to lick my fingers and get what I could out of my clothes. Signless and Kankri seemed to be doing the same. Yet, not even a moment later, Kankri and I were being lifted up by strong, familiar arms and carried to the closest bathroom. Signless got started a sower for both Kankri and I while we stripped down to our boxers. I'm sure Signless would have joined us if not for the tub only fitting two people. _Curse this bathtub._ Even after many years of Kankri and I living together and taking showers (and baths) together, he /still/ faces away from me. _What's his problem anyways? It's not like I'm going to do anything he wouldn't like. Or, maybe he's just embarrassed? Oh! Who fucking knows._ Washing off all of the food, I stepped under the water once I was satisfied with the cleanliness of myself. I open my eyes to a very flustered Kankri, covering himself, waiting to use the water to rinse off. Stepping aside, I gave him access to the water. _Damn, he's so cute when he's flustered like that._ Coming out of my trance to see to confused eyes looking at me, I look away, embarrassed. "Is there s9mething wr9ng Karkat? S9mething y9u need?"

"NO." ~~_Worst day of my life._~~ Kankri shrugs and goes back to what he's doing, but I'm stuck in a daydream again. _What if I just..._ Not even realizing it, I'm reached my hand out towards Kankri's face. Pulling his face towards mine, I lean towards his lips. Surprisingly, he lets me and I'm eternally grateful. _Mmm, they're just as soft as I imagined. Wait?! Is he kissing back?! He is! Correction. Best.Day.Ever._ Moving forwards, I push Kankri up against the wall. Deepening the kiss, I notice our lips fit like pieces of a puzzle. Licking Kankri's bottom lip for entrance, I'm shocked when he allows this. Sliding my tongue into his mouth I start to search around in there while I push my knee in between Kankri's legs. This causes him to squirm out of the slight pleasure it gives him as his grabs a hold of my hair in tight fists. Smirking lightly against his lips, I bring my hands down to grope his delicious ass. Suddenly the shower curtain is pulled back by Signless. _#Bulgeblockmuch_  

"Oh, so that's what was taking you two so long." Both Kankri's and my face became as red as they could at Signless' statement. Signless turned off the water as soon as he entered the room. I think he said something after that, but I was too caught up in my own embarrassment to listen. Not even a moment later, Signless had picked the both of us up and brought us to his bedroom. Plopping us down on the bed, this was when I noticed that Signless was only in a towel that was discarded a moment after. Getting the idea, I turn around and capture Kankri's lips in mine again while Signless trails kisses down both of our entangled bodies. Sucking on his bottom lip, I slip my tongue into his mouth. As we fight for dominance, Signless starts leaving hickeys all over our bodies. Kankri and I can't help but moan against each other's lips. I could feel Kankri's bulge wiggling around under me, wrapping around my own. 

"Mmm, K - Kankri..." I moaned out. Grabbing his horns with one hand, I rubbed up and down his grub-scars with my other hand. Kankri tensed slightly before relaxing and leaning into my touch. Making out with Kankri, our lips became sore, while Signless positioned himself behind Kankri and brought him into his lap. Straddling Kankri, I prepped his nook and Signless prepped his ass. Scissoring Kankri, I got many beautiful noises out of him and I cherished every single one as I started to suck and nip at Kankri's neck and chest. Rubbing his horns with my free hand, I noticed Signless doing the same. "A - ah~" I let out a loud moan as Kankri grabbed my left horn with one hand and started scissoring /me/ with his other. 

"Mm - Mhhm... Aa - aaah~" Kankri let out when Signless inserted his bulge into Kankri's ass while I pushed my bulge into his nook. Pulling his hand away from my horns for a split second, Kankri grabbed my chin and brought it up from where I was still sucking on his neck. Capturing my lips in a heated kiss, Kankri brought his hand back up to my horns and caressed them. 

"M - Mmm hmm~" I moaned out as my tentibulge started to move crazily inside of Kankri. Speaking of Kankri, he has added another finger into my nook, "Aaahh Aah Mmm~" Deepening the kiss, I moved my previously occupied hand up to play with Kankri's grub-scars. "Mmm - hmm Aaaahh~" Kankri moaned out. Kankri removed his fingers from my nook and I instantly missed the feeling of them inside. "Aaaah Mmmm Aa - Aaaaahhh~" I moaned out as the missing feeling was soon replaced by the pleasure of his bulge wiggling around inside of my nook. Hands were everywhere, touching everything, I was stuck in bliss while we all pressed as close as possible to each other. It were almost as if we were trying to become one being. _Haha._ "Mmmm Hmmm Mm - Mmmm Aaaaaahhhh Aa - Aahhhh~" Moans from the three of us filled the room, it was like music to my ears. Minutes later there was genetic material /everywhere./ Kankri's flushed face was all I could really focus on and it was beautiful.

We fell asleep in each other's arms that night and it was the. Best. _I never want this to end; us to end._

**Author's Note:**

> I hope I did good with the threesome. Not entirely sure if I did, but it was fun to write so yeah.


End file.
